Time For a New Story

The narratives we tell ourselves are important.

Partly because what we tell ourselves is what we’ll live out. There’s no escaping that.

But also because we have a tendency to centre ourselves. Which is dangerous.

It also means we can hurt others….

Let’s look at love (and sex).

Over the years all I’ve ever done is focus on how another person didn’t reciprocate my feelings or respond the way I want them to.

But……..

I’m not the centre of the universe.

Neither are you.

The more I interrogate myself and my past….I realise….I’ve rejected people…I haven’t returned feelings. 9/10 times those people have dealt with it better than I have. Their kindness towards me hasn’t diminished

There’s a lesson in this.

Whatever you want….

Love
Sex
Pleasure
Joy
Friendship
Understanding

You are likely being rejected by someone for those things….but you’re also likely rejecting others too.

I know I’ve rejected people for some of these things and denied some of things to others, I’ve not been aware until recently as I’ve taken time to reflect and interrogate myself.

I need to get over myself. We all do really….

Love, sex, companionship….all of this shit is a multi-sided thing……we get rejected, we reject others….but we’re all gonna find what we’re looking for…..the right fit, it’ll come….until then though, we gotta just get on with life.

Want love?

Be more loving to others.

Want friendship?

Be a better friend to others.

I’ve fallen short on these and numerous other dimensions.

But, I wanna do better.

The work begins now.

To turn up to life as a more generous and empathetic person.

加油.